Snuggles

I got to hold Kassidy last night, which was incredible!! I have not held her for 3 1/2 weeks. I was so excited all day long! We were told we could hold her on Sunday, but we ended up not having our primary nurse that day (which I will not say why because it ticks me off) Then we were told we could hold her Monday, but the nurse went to ask the nurse practioner if I had to gown up still and she said I couldnt hold her without a doctors order. So Tuesday during rounds the Dr gave the order I could hold her everyday, but he will leave it up to the nurses. Our nurses and us decided we would do only once or twice a week for now. She is trying to do so much on her own right now, we dont want to over stimulate her or stress her out. 1 day a week is better than 0...

She felt so much bigger, not just a blanket with a head!! She did so well, Looked around and was so alert and calm. She tolerated about 15 minutes and then she started to drop her oxygen. We put her back in her islet and it came back up. She did so good and I was so happy! I loved kissin her fingers and her sweet little head. I cherish these small special snuggles with her.

We also had our parent to parent night. There is 2 families that we have been getting to know pretty good. We got to see their babies last night. They are all such fighters and so adorable. We are all going through different hurdles, yet we all know exactly how the other feels. I am amazed with all of us. It takes a special child to make it through what these babies go through, but it also takes special parents. I never thought it would be me. I have learned alot about myself.

I am able to endure this, this trial is not going to break me. There is always sunshine through the rain. Sometimes it is just covered by clouds.

I am grateful to have a supportive family and an even more amazing husband. Not all the women there have a supportive spouse, which breaks my heart.

She had a couple moments last night where her heart rate would drop and she would stop breathing (like hold her breath) Can you say SCARY!!! Our favorite nurse was working and was so calm, she said just stimulate her by flicking her feet and rubbing her back. She told us to just watch her color and her bodys signals, since we wont have a machine when we go home! WHAT??!! Shes gonna do this at home? Oh man do I need to prepare better for that.

This is Nurse "M" So amazing!!!